Saturday, January 29, 2011

Gymkata (1985 90 minutes)

A supremely skilled gymnast must train even harder to enter 'The Game' in the country of Parmistan so the USA can put a strategic missile tracking site there. The guy who plays the gymnast was already 5 years past his athletic prime when this was made but he can still walk  up a flight of stairs on his hands (part of his training) like nobodies business. There are some guys who don't want him to make it and they even kidnap the Princess  of Parmistan to try to stop him so there are some shootouts, axe attacks, and even a car crash. The Game itself is a series of obstacles (like rope climbs) where guys in hoods shoot at you with arrows, all culminating in this closed off village where the country sends it's most dangerous crazy people, I swear they stole this part of the movie for the Resident Evil 4 game. Thankfully there are some strategically placed exercise equipment around for the gymnast to fight on, including a pommel horse part where they fight for about 20 minutes. Any country that would base its political future on guys named Thorg running around in a swamp beating up other guys deserves all of the imperialism it gets. All you had to do was say this was directed by the same guy who did Black Belt Jones and Deadly Eyes and I'm all over it + it has a really long slo-motion scene.
 

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