Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Cross Mission (1989 93 minutes)

Sleazy General Romero, the dictator of some unknown South American country, pledges to the cameras to stop the drug lords and their evil ways and then he burns some token crops. Too bad he is secretly the biggest of the drug lords and he is trying to weed out the competition. Some guy from America working for 'The Organization'  (but he may also be working undercover) hooks up with a nosy reporter and goes to pay the general a visit. Deep in the jungle, the rebel forces have been waiting for their moment to strike. This could have been another of your average gunfights in the Amazons type movie until the general reveals his secret Macumba Voodoo powers he learned from his mother. Poof! First he makes a little creepy mini me (the same guy who played the title character in Ratman) appear in a cloud of smoke. Then he zaps the reporter with blue rays from his fingertips, saying they are better then any lie detector-  "Hands that can cure....or kill!.....Annihilate!". If this doesn't send your brain into outer space then i don't know how to help you.  The American and the reporter somehow get caught up in the crossfire between the rebels and the general's men. They get captured by the army and are to be sent to the infamous Camp 5 prison when the rebels rescue them. Luckily, the American is some sort of Commando type and is able to lead them on an assault of the infamous camp. The reporter doesn't fare so well as she gets zapped again by the general. Don't worry, the mini me makes a few more appearances as well before the explosion filled finale. Poof!



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